Mourning the Fantasy of a Flat Bottom

Last night I was sad. I was sad because I saw a dog on TV and I want a dog. I was sad because I've recently been carved like a turkey and I have a hole in my leg which must be poked regularly by ruthless nurses with sharp utensils. And I was sad because I came to the realisation that no matter how well I eat (and by well I mean healthily) and how much excercise I do, I will always have a big bottom.

Recently I've been on a healthy-eating and intense-yoga-every-day stint. I'm doing it for several reasons. First of all so that I'm giving my body lots of nutrients and vitamins to repair itself. Second of all because a doctor dared to hint that I might possibly be overweight (the nurse I saw the next day assured me that I wasn't overweight, and so does the NHS website when I calculate by BMI! :-) ), and finally, well, I think that being slimmer is something that most of us girls (and guys too, I'm sure) want to achieve. Or if we don't want to lose weight because we're already very slim, we want more muscle or to be curvier. It's just the nature of the beast; never satisfied with what we have.

Last night I happened to stumble across an article online, which I think everyone should read, because it's very sensible. You can read it here: https://www.findingbalance.com/articles/understanding-body-types/. I don't mean to spoil the ending for you, but basically it talks about how there are different body types (ectomorphs: meaning people who find it hard to put on weight, endomorphs: meaning people who gain weight easily, and mesomorphs: who fall somewhere in the middle and to be more athletically built). As women, we also tend to fall into distinct body shape categories, i.e. the apple (broader shoulders and bust but narrower hips), the pear (heavier bottom half), the banana (mostly the same size up and down), and the hourglass (bust and hip size proportional to each other). I am decidely A PEAR.

The article suggests that our optimal weight and build is that which we reach when we are eating well (not frequently overindulging, neither starving ourselves) and doing moderate exercise. This makes a lot of sense. Yes we can become more toned and lose flab where flab is not needed to flab, but we can't actually alter our body shape. No matter how healthily I eat or how much yoga I do, I will never be able to go from a pear to a banana. As much as I would like to be a banana. Or a shapely hourglass.

I don't know why it is I fail to appreciate by ample nether regions. Or wait, I do! Maybe it's because we're conditioned to believe that any excess anywhere (except in the chestal regions) is ugly and abominable. We see perfectly photo-shopped models and air-brushed actresses who have personal fitness trainers and ridicilous dietary habits, and think that we ought to be able to look like them. Our society and the media play on our supposed 'flaws' and sell us every possible gimmick and fad to help us 'fix' ourselves.

I'm trying to tone-up and lose a little wobbliness, and that can only be a good thing. But I've realised that I've had this false idea in my mind, that somehow if I lose enough weight I will look perfect like the models I see in magazines. This is utter ridiculousness. I will look like me, only more toned and less flabby. I am pear-shaped and I will always be pear-shaped. Destiny has ordained it to be so.

I think what's most important, and one of the most important things we can learn to do in this life, is to accept ourselves as we are. Then eating healthily, exercising or doing anything to improve your body is simply to make life better for yourself, and your body stronger. You want to be the best version of yourself, not somebody else.

Something I've learned recently is that we should never take our health for granted. If you're healthy, be grateful. You've got a wonderful body that is capable of so much. Accept it. Love it. Celebrate it. There's only one you, after all.

And here I am, thighs, bottom and all!